Oh man was Zoey pissed at me this weekend and I can’t say I blame her

Do you ever mess up with your kid’s schedule? Because I pulled a doozie (doozy??) this weekend. Like you accidentally forget about an activity and you schedule a play date at the same time or you totally forget to bring your kid to a birthday party and don’t realize until afterward? You’re sitting there chilling out on the couch and your phone dings and you look at it and it says something like “we missed Holden at the birthday party today,” and suddenly you get this giant pit in your stomach. Shiiiiiit.

I mean I know we shouldn’t get too pissed at ourselves when something like this happens because we’re juggling soooo much stuff for our kids, but it literally makes me lie awake in bed stressing about it in the middle of the night sometimes.

Well this weekend I did it again. I messed up big time. I won’t get into the boring details, but I accidentally scheduled Zoey’s ice skating test during a big party she wanted to go to, and she was pissssed. I don’t blame her, but there was really nothing I could do except apologize to her a lot and tell her we can’t do everything. So I drove her to the rink and along the way, we had this lovely conversation…

ME: Are you excited to kick butt today and pass to the next level?!!

ZOEY: No.

ME: Are you nervous?

ZOEY: I’m not going to pass.

ME: With that attitude you totally aren’t.

ZOEY: I suck at my three turns and my (mumbles some other ice skating move).

ME: Hey Zoey, I know you’re not happy about missing the party, but that doesn’t mean you can just frown and do bad on your test.

ZOEY: Grunt.

By this point I was getting mad. I mean yeah she can be pissed, but we pay like gazillions of dollars for her to ice skate and just think of all the shoes I could buy for myself if I didn’t spend that on her. Not to mention all the time I spend schlepping her to the rink.

ME: (through gritted teeth) Zoey Lila Alpert, you listen to me closely because I’m only going to say this once. You are not allowed to have that attitude. I don’t care if you pass, but I DO care if your attitude sucks. You better start smiling right now.

ZOEY: Fine.

ME: No, not fine. Let me see a smile.

She fakes the crappiest smile ever.

ME: Fake it better.

She fakes it a little better.

ME: Who do you believe in?

ZOEY: Mommmm.

ME: No. WHO do you believe in?

ZOEY: (whispers) me.

ME: Who do you believe in?!!

ZOEY: Me.

ME: WHO DO YOU BELIEVE IN?!!!!

ZOEY: MEEEEEEEE!!!!!

And then she went onto the ice rink while I sat in the waiting area beating myself up for yelling at her and feeling guilty about the whole thing. I totally pictured her having a crappy attitude on the ice and then coming off bawling and yelling at me for making her miss the party all so she could just fail her test. But I probably should have taken my own advice. I should have faked a smile and given myself a pep talk.

ME: Who do you believe in?

ME: me.

ME: Who do you believe in?!!

ME: Me.

ME: WHO DO YOU BELIEVE IN?!!!!

ME: MEEEEEEEE!!!!!

Because sixty minutes later she burst out through the doors with a smile on her face waving a sheet of paper that said she passed!! She did it! And it wasn’t until many hours later that I realized something else too. She’s not the only one who did it. I did it. I DID IT!!!!! I helped her turn that frown upside down and suck it up and get out there and face the challenge and succeed.

Sometimes parents F up. And sometimes parents kick ass. And sometimes we do a little bit of both. This was one of those days.

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There are 3 comments for this article
  1. Danielle Ferretti at 9:28 am

    I can’t love this enough ! And I have a Zoe (but with no Y) too ! She’s 9, and also Ice Skates !!! We were just in Orlando for the Florida Open Competition this past weekend. OMG Karen, are we living parallel lives…… ? Love your blog. 🙂

  2. Danielle Ferretti at 3:55 pm

    I used to think you were my spirit animal, and now I am starting to believe you are my twin in a parallel universe…. like in a Sliding Doors kinda way. Except I look nothing like Gwyneth Paltrow. Maybe in my mind. 🙂

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