Dear Chrissy Teigen, Okay, you can’t see me right now so let me tell you that I am literally on my knees bowing down to you as I write this letter, which doesn’t make it easy to type. I mean technically America doesn’t have royalty, but you are my queen. Not because you’re gorgeous,…
Dear Aunt Ida, WTF? Seriously? Do you seriously think I want a fuzzy sweater with a 3D reindeer on it for the holidays? I mean thank you for the present and nothing against reindeers, but where the heck am I supposed to wear this thing? To the ugly sweater party I wasn’t invited to…
OMG, I am so excited for Holden. He is totally going to be the best soccer player ever. My hubby and I both played and we are just super excited that he’s such an athletic kid. He’s amazing. See? Yup, this is him in action. Impressive, eh? We tried coaxing, threatening, bribing, begging, and ignoring,…
You know what kills me? How my kiddos used to speak when they were little. OMG, their tiny adorable voices and their baby laughs and their funny toddler words. Zoey used to call coconuts “nuck nucks” and Holden called guacamole “macamole.” It was so stinkin’ cute. But they slowly learned the real words now they sound coherent…
Oh my God. Not OMG. This story is way too serious for abbreviations. So yesterday after school and baseball, Holden came home smelling all stinky, so after dinner I told him to go upstairs and get ready for a bath. HOLDEN: I’m tired.
Dear Target, I’m sorry, but I’ve been cheating on you. A lot. Do I still love you? With all of my heart and soul and I still love pushing a cart around your store and putting way more things into it than what I came for, but it just doesn’t happen as much as…
Dear Zoey, So this morning was a little rough. I saw what happened. The way you purposely put your hair up in crazy pigtails and popped that unicorn headband on your head and headed off to school with energy and excitement and happy feelings.
So my hubby started something with my daughter about two years ago and it’s brilliant. He started this thing where whenever Zoey wants to talk about something private with him, she just has to say the word lockdown to him and they go into a room just the two of them and she can talk…
It killed me to write that title. KILLED me. I mean Disney is like my absolute favorite place on earth. At least that’s how I felt three weeks ago. This summer my hubby and I each planned a family trip to celebrate our ten-year anniversary– mine was to Disney World and his was to Acadia…
OMG, you’re not going to believe what just happened. So our family is shopping in this souvenir store, when suddenly I hear a big crash and then I hear Zoey screaming and crying, so of course I freak out and bolt across the store to find Zoey sobbing and holding her head. I’m looking around…