Holy crap, last night took ten years off my life. If not more. I still have that feeling of WTF just happened. Let me start from the beginning. So I’m sitting on the couch watching The Bachelor with my hubby when I get a text message from Zoey. ZOEY (text): Mom I need help!
Okay, so based on the reaction I got from last week’s blog post, it struck like a HUGE F’ing chord with sooooo many parents. Which makes sense. I mean we schlep our kids to and from activities and sports and shell out a crapload of money, and then what happens? They want to quit!! And…
It’s taken me a little while to write this post. Not because I’ve been busy (don’t get me wrong, I’m constantly busy). But because I needed time to process. Oh crap, I sound like I’ve been in therapy about this. Nope. I’ve just watched enough reality TV that I often use words like process and…
Dear teenager, Every day when I pick you up from school, I have a moment of dread. What mood are you going to be in when you get in the car? Are you going to say it was the best day ever, or are you going to be a miserable wreck of a human being…
So we just got back from The Grand at Moon Palace, an all-inclusive resort in Mexico, and I have two VERY important words for you: FREE MARGARITAS. I shit you not. They were FREEEEE… unless you consider the fact that you paid a crapload to go there in the first place. So are they really…
Dear Hubbies, Wives, Mommies, Daddies, Grannies, Aunties, Kiddos, Secret Santas, and anyone else who needs a gift guide, They say it’s the thought that counts, but the thought should not be WTF when someone opens up your gift? So I’ve scoured the world for the most kickass items I could find for this year’s gift…
Wanna know why it sucks to have a teenage girl? Oh wait, I don’t have time to write an entire book right now. Fine, then wanna know why it’s AWESOME to have a teenage girl? Because you get to show her all your favorite old movies and watch them together. Look how excited my daughter…
Dear friend, So the other day when I ran into you at Target, you said you miss hanging out with me. That we should go out for dinner or drinks sometime. I know we never really talked about what happened between us, the way our relationship just kind of fizzled out. Because here’s the thing.…
Okay, so I’ll admit it. When my daughter started junior high, I barely knew WTF I was doing. But now that Zoey’s in the 8th grade and she’s 2/3 of the way through, after making thousands of mistakes, I can officially say I’ve learned a few things. So here goes. Here are a bunch of…
“Why don’t we live here?” I literally uttered this phrase every single day we were in Vail. And now that I’m home and I look out the window and the only view I have is of our weird neighbor who vacuums her front lawn and plants fake flowers in her yard (I kid you not),…