Dear friend, So the other day when I ran into you at Target, you said you miss hanging out with me. That we should go out for dinner or drinks sometime. I know we never really talked about what happened between us, the way our relationship just kind of fizzled out. Because here’s the thing.…
Okay, so I’ll admit it. When my daughter started junior high, I barely knew WTF I was doing. But now that Zoey’s in the 8th grade and she’s 2/3 of the way through, after making thousands of mistakes, I can officially say I’ve learned a few things. So here goes. Here are a bunch of…
“Why don’t we live here?” I literally uttered this phrase every single day we were in Vail. And now that I’m home and I look out the window and the only view I have is of our weird neighbor who vacuums her front lawn and plants fake flowers in her yard (I kid you not),…
I am going INSANE. Like literally, someone needs to strap me into a straight jacket and lock me in a padded cell WITHOUT any internet. And here’s why. This week we sent Zoey to overnight camp, and while not having her around makes me feel like I’m missing a limb, that’s not why I’m going…
*”ATORIA’S” SWEEPSTAKES OFFICIAL RULES *NO PURCHASE NECESSARY TO ENTER OR WIN. A PURCHASE OR PAYMENT OF ANY KIND WILL NOT INCREASE YOUR CHANCES OF WINNING. VOID WHERE PROHIBITED BY LAW ELIGIBILITY:The “Atoria’s” Sweepstakes (“Sweepstakes”) is open only to legal residents of the fifty (50) continental United States and the District of Columbia (void in Puerto…
Okay, let’s talk periods. Yup, yup, yup, I’m going there. But I’m not saying a word about my own kiddo because OMG that would be TMI big time and I really prefer she doesn’t disown me for the rest of our lives. But it might be a good idea to have a pair or two…
WAITRESS: Would you guys like to start off with any chips and guacamole or queso and we have strawberry and peach margaritas tonight? ME: Yes. WAITRESS: Which one would you like?
So I have a question for all the hetero wives out there. Has your husband ever said he’d finish a project in the house and didn’t do it? Or half did it? Or literally went out and bought all the supplies for it and then left them in the bag for YEARS? Like how long…
Dear person who thinks the moms who are having trouble finding formula should just breastfeed, I hear you. I mean why on earth would a mom NOT take advantage of breastfeeding? Duhh, it’s free. Plus, if you breastfeed you never have to go out in the middle of the night to buy formula. Or deal…
*”Gobi Heat” SWEEPSTAKES OFFICIAL RULES *NO PURCHASE NECESSARY TO ENTER OR WIN. A PURCHASE OR PAYMENT OF ANY KIND WILL NOT INCREASE YOUR CHANCES OF WINNING. VOID WHERE PROHIBITED BY LAW ELIGIBILITY:The “Gobi Heat” Sweepstakes (“Sweepstakes”) is open only to legal residents of the fifty (50) continental United States and the District of Columbia (void…