The secret to helping your girl grow up to be a happy woman

1. Teach her how to look in the mirror and see a person, not a face.

2. Teach her that a little chocolate is okay. A little pizza is okay. And a little body fat is okay too.

3. Teach her that friends are like columns. You can lean on them all you want, but don’t step on them like horizontal rungs on a ladder.

4. Teach her how to hold her head up high and ask for more money. From her boss, not her husband.

5. Teach her that friends are more important than boyfriends (or girlfriends if that’s the way she swings).

6. Teach her to pick a spouse who wants to take care of her, but knows she doesn’t need it.

7. Teach her to believe she can become the president. Not the first female president, because gender is irrelevant.

8. Teach her that in a good marriage spouses divide and conquer, but that it’s important to switch it up sometimes so you both know how to do everything.

9. Teach her that a powerful woman is not a bitch, and a bitch is not a powerful woman.

10. Teach her the following things won’t make her more beautiful: makeup, Botox, fillers, plastic surgery. But that these things will: kindness, a smile, strength, a good heart.

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