I just found out I might have breast cancer, and I’m scared shitless
ME: Hello?
RECEPTIONIST: Hi this is Nancy at Willow Hospital, I’m calling about your recent mammogram.
Insert stomach in throat.
ME: Yes?
RECEPTIONIST: We need you to come back in for a repeat mammogram. Let’s see, we don’t have any openings today. Let me look at Monday.
Trying not to freak out.
ME: Can you tell me why?
RECEPTIONIST: The doctor saw some asymmetrical breast tissue on your left breast that looks different than last year.
ME: Oh.
RECEPTIONIST: We can see you Monday at 12:45.
ME: Wait, tell me again. Why am I coming in?
Because my brain has basically lost all function at this point and I didn’t hear anything you just said.
RECEPTIONIST: The doctor saw some asymmetrical breast tissue on your left breast that she wants to look at more closely.
ME: Are there any openings today?
Because 12:45 on Monday is like 72 hours away and I’m going to be shitting bricks and scared out of my mind until then.
RECEPTIONIST: Nope, sorry, all filled up today. Does Monday at 12:45 work?
ME: Sure.
Nooooo, no it doesn’t. Couldn’t you have just called me at 12:40 on Monday and told me to drive right over because I am NOT good at waiting. Especially when I feel like I’m waiting to find out whether I’m going to live or die.
RECEPTIONIST: And I’ll also go ahead and schedule an ultrasound at 1:00 in case they need to do that too.
ME: Alright.
Wait, do you do that for everyone? Or are you just doing this for me because you think it’s going to be bad news?
RECEPTIONIST: Okay, call this number to pre-register and blah blah blah blah blah.
(we hang up)
What just happened? I need to process this. Oh my God, I might have breast cancer. My grandmother died of breast cancer at 49. One of my best friends had it in her early thirties. And now I might have it. This cannot be happening. I have to talk to my husband right away. But I can’t right now because Holden is getting his haircut and I’m in the middle of a kids’ hair salon and everyone will hear me.
HOLDEN: Mom. Mom. Mom. Mom. Mom.
Act normal.
ME: What honey? Oh, look at your haircut, you look so handsome.
This can’t be happening.
HOLDEN: Can I have a lollipop?
ME: Sure.
(twenty minutes later)
HUBBY: Hi, what’s up?
ME: I just got a call and I have to go in to get a repeat mammogram Monday.
Shit, maybe I should have told him in person tonight. Maybe I shouldn’t have just blurted it out. I don’t know why but I needed to tell him right away so he could tell me it’s probably just a false alarm.
GREG: That’s not good. Why?
ME: The doctor saw something on the first one. Asymmetrical breast tissue on my left breast.
GREG: What’s that?
ME: I don’t know. But she said it looks different than last year. Hopefully they’re just checking.
GREG: I’m sure that’s it. They’re extra careful these days.
That’s what I needed to hear. Deep breath out. Don’t freak out yet.
(three hours later staring at my boobs in the mirror)
Wait, is my left one bigger? I can’t tell. I don’t think so. But isn’t my left one usually a little smaller than my right, and now it looks the same. Oh shit.
(five hours later)
HOLDEN: I want Daddy to put me to sleep.
ZOEY: Nooo, I want Daddy.
HOLDEN: No, I doooo!
Seriously guys? Can’t you just pick me tonight? Please. I really really need to hug and kiss you guys a lot because I might have breast cancer and then I’ll have to get all sorts of stuff done to my chest and I won’t be able to hug you for a while and I might even die and then Daddy will be putting you to bed every night, so I’d really like to tonight.
But A. They don’t know I might have breast cancer. And B. Even if they did know they might still pick Daddy tonight.
(the next day)
Wow, this is so weird. I can’t believe I’m walking around and acting all normal but I might have breast cancer.
(Sunday)
Dear God, please, pleeeeeeease, I know I like never pray to you and I forget all the time, but please let it be nothing tomorrow. Please let it be that the technician made a mistake.
(Monday morning)
ME: I’m really scared.
HUBBY: It’s going to be okay. I love you.
(Monday at 12:45)
RECEPTIONIST: Put this gown on with the opening in the front and when you’re ready wait in the chairs.
ME: Thank you.
It’s going to be nothing. It’s going to be nothing. It’s going to be nothing. It’s going to be nothing. It’s going to be nothing. It’s going to be nothing.
But what if it’s not?
TECHNICIAN: Karen?
ME: That’s me.
TECHNICIAN: Come with me in here.
She takes me into an exam room, sets some stuff up and examines something on a screen while I wait. And wait and think and wait and think. And then I can’t help but ask.
ME: Can you see what the doctor saw?
TECHNICIAN: Yes. Do you want to see?
I don’t know, do I? I walk over.
TECHNICIAN: See this spot here?
ME: Uh-huh.
TECHNICIAN: And this one.
There’s more than one?
TECHNICIAN: And right here. And here.
Wait, four spots? FOUR?!!! That looks bad. I mean I had a mammogram last year so how are there four new spots since then? Does that mean it’s growing and spreading really quickly. Oh my God, I can’t breathe.
TECHNICIAN: Okay, step over here. This is going to be uncomfortable.
ME: Do whatever you need to do.
I have two kids so let’s not mess around. You do WHATEVER you have to do.
TECHNICIAN: Okay, this is going to be tight. Now hold your breath.
Shoot, I wish I took a deeper breath before she told me to hold it.
TECHNICIAN: Okay, you can breathe again.
Lady, I won’t be able to breathe again until you tell me everything looks clear and I don’t have to get an ultrasound after this.
ME: Can you tell anything?
TECHNICIAN: I can’t tell.
Wait, does that mean she’s not ABLE to tell because she doesn’t know how to read the images or does that mean she CAN’T tell me because she’s legally not allowed to say anything bad? Shit, why did I ask?
TECHNICIAN: Okay, all done. Come wait in the waiting area again and someone will come get you if you need an ultrasound.
(Two minutes later)
Aggghhhh, all these people are sitting in here chit-chatting and I want to punch them in the face!!! I might have cancer and you guys are talking about The Bachelorette. Are you kidding me? Shuuuuttttt upppppp!!!
NURSE: Karen?
ME: Hi.
NURSE: Okay, come into this room and lie on the table.
Wait, what? I have to get an ultrasound? You’re supposed to say it’s nothing. That the technician made a mistake on the first mammogram. This is bad. Oh God, here come the tears.
ME: When do I get to talk to the doctor?
NURSE: She’ll be in in a minute to do the ultrasound.
Wait, does the doctor always do it or does this mean she’s really concerned? Someone tell me something!!!
DOCTOR: Hello, Karen. I’m Dr. You’re Screwed.
ME: Is it bad?
DOCTOR: Let’s just take a look.
(9,000 seconds later, not really but that’s what it feels like)
ME: Can you tell anything?
DOCTOR: Have you ever had cysts before?
ME: No. Never.
DOCTOR: See, look at this black area. It’s just a cyst.
ME: That’s good, right?
DOCTOR: Yup, all good.
ME: All of them?
DOCTOR: Nothing to worry about blah blah blah blah blah, medical gobbledy goop. It was nice meeting you.
AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH, I’m okay, I’m okay!!!!!! Oh thank God it’s good news!
(Ten minutes later)
TEXT TO HUBBY: All is good!!!!
REPLY FROM HUBBY: That is awesome. I love you.
(Eight hours later as I’m getting ready for bed)
ME: This day could have been so much worse. Think about all the people who found out today they have cancer.
HUBBY: I know.
ME: That could have been me.
HUBBY: But it wasn’t.
ME: But it could have been.
HUBBY: But it wasn’t.
ME: You’re right.
HUBBY: I usually am.
ME: (eye roll)
THE END
This happened to me last week and I debated whether to share it with you or not. I mean it’s super personal, plus I know lots of people (over 500 a day) get the bad news that they have breast cancer and I’m not trying to rub it in that my results were good. But I learned a lot from this:
1. Getting a mammogram every year is super important because whether they’re cysts or something else, a lot can change a lot in 365 days.
2. If you are called back for a repeat mammogram, there’s a good chance it’s not a big deal so don’t freak out (like I did), or at least try not to.
3. And God forbid it is cancer, early detection is HUGE. Do not wait because you’re scared of what the results might be.
4. Don’t take anything for granted. Love and hug your kids every day. I mean maybe not when they’re being annoying douchenuggets, but you know, when they’re not.
(2015 update: I got called back again this year, but this time they saw something that was 1.5 centimeters in my left breast. I was scared shitless. Luckily this year I had my mammogram on a Monday so I didn’t have to wait a lonnnng excruciating weekend. I will ALWAYS schedule it for a Monday from now on. The doctor checked it and after the longest thirty seconds of my life, he told me it was a cyst again. Thank God. And then I reached up and grabbed his chest because I was so relieved. And then I apologized for grabbing his chest and explained that it was my way of hugging him since I couldn’t actually hug him since I was lying topless on the table with warm goop all over my boob. Needless to say, it was awkward. But I’ll take awkward any day over getting bad news. And next year if they call me back again, I’ll be a little less scared. But not really.)
(2016 update: I’m not gonna even say because I’ll sound like a broken record.)
If you like this, please don’t forget to like and share it. Thank you!!
Thank you for sharing this personal story. Early detection IS the BEST defense. And, working in radiology myself, I can tell you that people are very often called back for a repeat and it’s totally normal to book an ultrasound at the same time. In some states now (NJ just started), even if you just have dense breasts you can be called back for both. Your husband’s right (eye roll) they are extra careful these days!
Wow, I have been through similar situations and that is exactly how I reacted. It’s a terrifying experience. I am so glad to hear that you are ok. Thank you for sharing. P.S. F**K YOU CANCER!
Karen, we (your loyal fans) love you. Cripes, I’m crying so much I can barely see to type. :'(
I’m so glad you are ok! I went through something similar about 2 months ago. My b**b hurt in the same spot for like 3 months and I decided it was stupid to see if it would just go away. Glad I did, and everything is fine but I was worried because my mom had breast cancer at age 44.
Great news for you! Keep up with your screenings—what would we do without BS??!?
This made me cry because I just went through the EXACT same thing, only I could feel a lump. They think it is nothing but it is so scary, especially to think about how that would effect my children. Thanks for sharing. I’m glad everything is ok with you!
That is for sucks that you had to wait so long to go in! It’s the waiting, and the waiting, and all the things that can go through your head none of them positive while you’re waiting, and waiting.
I am glad everything is good!
You are hilarious, and I really enjoy reading all your funny posts. But these serious things you discuss (like this or your serious chapter in your book) are awesome! You have such a down to earth, realistic way of looking at things and reacting. You make the serious stuff fun to read while really reaching people and connecting to their feelings. You are a wonderful writer whether it’s funny or serious issues! Glad you are okay!
Thanks for sharing this! Perhaps this will inspire someone to get tested today!
Thanks for making me cry down my shirt for you. I am so happy you are OK. Good thing you are taking care of yourself and going to those appointments.
Exact same thing happened to me. Exactly. Same freak out, same panic, same results, and same awareness that I was so lucky and just how important these check ups are! Thanks for posting!
This was an awesome read… Glad you’re okay.
As a Doctor, I get “the phone call” from patients all the time that they’ve been called back for more views and “WTF, Doc! Do I have Breast CANCER?” It is scary and this is such a good reminder to all of my colleagues that all our patients hear is “blah blah, gobblety gook, medical noise” and “cancer” or “Not cancer.” I plan to do a blog post soon on medical gobblety gook and would love to put a link to your blogpost on this.
Breast cancer is often a treatable cancer, if caught early, and your message to GET YOUR MAMMOGRAM is a good one. There is a lot of controversy in the medical literature as to whether mammo’s should be done yearly, or every other year.
The most important thing is to GET THEM. If there is a family history, I always tell my patients to go YEARLY.
At what age should women start getting mammograms? I am 31 years old. My great-grandmother died of breast cancer, but neither my grandmother, mother, or aunt have had any signs of breast cancer. My mom does have cysts in her breasts so she gets a yearly one done, but she is also 54 years old.
Yes Doc take a stand on the “gobblety gook” talk that patients receive, I have developed an aversion to going to the doctor because of the cold-matter-of-fact manner in which the patients are treated by most medical staff. How cruel that Karen had to go through the entire weekend with this dread on her heart with the added stress of “not knowing”.
I read this, crying the whole entire time. I had a similar experience and my best friend did, too. You freak out. You pray to God, all His relatives, Buddha, all of them. You make deals like “I PROMISE to take better care of myself if you float me this ONE time”. It scares the s**t out of you and it awakens something in you. A courage you never even knew you had. I am so glad you are going to be ok. Now keep all those promises you made to yourself to take better care, to stop and smell the roses. YOU are worth it. And of course, sore boobies are an ace in the hole to get out of lots of things for the next week/month/year. 🙂
I completely related to EVERYTHING in this blog! I just got my first mammogram at 37 and was called back in. I was told it was routine and not to worry – it’s just because it was my first mammogram. The day I got there they did the mammogram, then decided they needed to do the ultrasound. They then decided they needed to do a biopsy. I was scheduled for three days later and I was thinking everything you thought. However, before I left they said they had a cancellation and I could get it done that day. But I still had to wait two days for the results of the biopsy. When I got a call from the doctor himself I was certain it was bad news but thankfully it was just a benign tumor. I’m glad you shared. The facts you pointed out at the end are key for women to remember. Early detection is key! We owe it to ourselves as women and/or moms to get checked!
I went through this same thing back in October. Except that I went in because my breast was hurting. I had to go in for the breast exam where they felt a lump. That got me sent in for an ultrasound an entire week later. The doctor called me in to tell me that the ultrasound showed a dense area that looked consistent of cancer so I had to have a biopsy…2 entire weeks later. The biopsy showed that it was just a cyst (big…huge…sigh of relief here). Apparently, the cyst is putting pressure on the inside of my breast that’s causing it to be painful? Something like that, I kinda quit listening when they told me it was just a cyst. Scares like this definitely give you a different perspective on things huh? So glad you got good news too! May we never be put through such torture again!!
Thanks for sharing – I could feel your fear. We went through something when my oldest was in utero and those waits are the worst. Glad your news was good news 🙂
Hi, I’m a reader and I’m a cancer epidemiologist. Mammograms in premenopausal women are actually not very effective, because breast tissue is too dense; radiologists just can’t see very much. This leads to tons and tons of false positives, and unfortunately also false negatives. (This would be why mammography before the age of 50 is controversial in the medical community– although that is an argument for another time.) Glad all is OK.
Thank you JJ for this post. My doctor has said the same thing to me, but after seeing so many under-50s posting about having mammograms on here, I was starting to wonder if he was right. Thanks for sharing 🙂
Then you are a tool of Big Pharma. 80% of EVERY oncologist’s income is FAILED chemotherapy. My sister died of ovarian cancer with the oncologist STILL wanting to do more chemo–at 50 to 100K per treatment. I refused chemo and did the the RSO protocol. She’s dead as fried chicken. I am cancer-free.
Thank you for sharing
Yes. Yes to this times three.
When I got my “we need to recheck something” call I did everything you did. Except speak a word of it. I couldn’t bear the thought of the words existing in the world. Like somehow speaking them out loud would make it real so I kept silent until my appointment. It took 4 hours of various tests during which I nervously sweat a gallon. Like you, I was lucky enough to get good news. At which point I could breathe and also, dared to speak of it to my husband and friends.
I’m so glad you got good news. And I’m so glad you chose to share you news as a reminder to the rest of us to pay attention to changes, make appointments, and that mammograms are important.
I held my breath through this entire read. Have been there myself, so glad you got good news and I too encourage everyone to get their regular screenings.We all know folks that are breast cancer warriors, no one else needs to join that club.
Happy tears are streaming down my face for you.
I went through the same thing last week! Except I found a lump on my 39th birthday. I had to wait all weekend too. So happy it was only cysts. Thanks for posting!
Thank you for sharing, I love reading your posts. Glad all is well.
Ditto here. Even had a biopsy due to family history–I am in the “not if but when” category in my mind. My biopsy was fine. I’m back to annual mammograms. It’s scary as hell but not a death sentence. Should you be diagnosed there are tons of resources to help and I am happy to help you find them…read family history, I know my way around breast cancer and have contacts all over the US to help.
I am sorry you had to wait 72 hours to be seen again, that’s just cruel. . When I got called for the follow up mammogram I was able to go the next day as they reserve all afternoon for repeats and I love them for that.
Please get a mammogram annually starting when you are 40 or sooner if you have a family history. I have been going since I was 30. It’s a bit uncomfortable but it’s over quickly and so worth it. Do your monthly self exams. Find a buddy and remind each other.
Men can get breast cancer too.
BRCA1/2 men get breast cancer. You should be tested for the BRCA 1/2 gene. You need to go. With your family history it is VERY likely you carry the BRCA1 or 2 breast cancer gene.With that cancer in your family ( your insurance company WILL pay for your genetic testing) because this gene is a killer and you NEED TO GO ASAP. My younger sister was BRCA1+ and she went for a mammo and was dx’d with breast cancer. While she was under anesthesia for the mastectomy they also discovered stage 4 ovarian cancer. She fought like a tiger and finally they tested her and she popped it and told me to get tested. Then she died November 18 2015 and I popped the test as well so my insurance company fell all over themselves to pay for a preventative hysterectomy that instead revealed stage 2-C Ovarian and Uterine cancer. High Grade Serous Carcinoma–it’s the most aggressive and virulent gynecological cancer there is–it’s what we BRCA1 girls get. While it is 1.24% of ALL cancer cases, 34% of the victims are BRCA1 or BRCA2 positive.
GO GET TESTED!!! TELL YOUR DOCTOR YOU THINK YOU MAY CARRY THE BRCA (BRACKA) GENE. YOU LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT!!!!!!
Yay!! So happy you are cancer free. Don’t ever scare me like that again!
Thanks for sharing your story !!! I’m sure you’ve helped a lot of women think about this & therefore some are making appt’s. I have 3 friends that have gotten that diagnosis & kicked its A$$ !!! All are well now. Please CHECK YOUR BOOBIES ladies !!!!!!!!!!!
I’m very glad you’re ok!
I had a very similar experience only a doctor told me it WAS cancer. Several days and images later, it was just a cyst. I actually had a bruise on the spot in question because I kept messing with it, as though I could fix it. I followed up by scheduling an appt with that idiot doctor just to yell at him for all the tears and gut wrenching worry.
Wow! Sounds exactly like my week! Glad for the both of us it’s “only” cysts.
I had a similar situation after being hospitalized with a breast infection that came out of nowhere (haven’t breast fed anything in 8 years)- the area in question was in the other breast, not the infected one. I remember laying there thinking- “is she going to tell me I have cancer? Holy s**t- she’s going to tell me I have cancer”. It wasn’t cancer (and I am truly grateful), but for a brief moment I was terrified and alone. Thank you for letting me know that I was never truly alone 🙂
This was the exact thing that happened to me almost thought for thought. Mine was a bit more but I go every 6months for a recheck . These fears also come along EVERY 6 months. I am glad your shared and also glad your ok !!!
Thank you for sharing this! Glad you don’t have cancer but it is a nice reminder nor to take life for granted 🙂
30 years old. Two young babies. Just had a double mastectomy on Friday for breast cancer. Thank goodness for self breast exams.
Jen – Sending you lots of healing energy and positive thoughts!!!
Oh Jen. I am so sorry but applaud your courage for having the double mastectomy. That’s exactly the decision I would make but I am older than you but I understand the motivation of removing the breast tissue removes much of the risk.
In my opinion you are much braver than Angelina Jolie who made the same decision because I can only imagine that you don’t have the same level of help that I imagine she has.
Sending love, thoughts and prayers your way.
Youngsurvival.org
I hope you’re doing okay now Jen. You made a brave decision for your babies and that is SOOOOO awesome. They’re lucky to have such an awesome mom… who will be around a lonnnnng time hopefully.
Thank you so much for sharing this! And this part:
“ME: Wait, tell me again. Why am I coming in?
Because my brain has basically lost all function at this point and I didn’t hear anything you just said.”
Yes!!!! Exactly! So glad you are OK.
I had a very similar experience so when it happened again I didn’t freak out quite so much. Thanks for sharing.
Thank you!
I had almost the exact same experience a little over a year ago and I swear that was the exact convo in my head. So glad yours was just a scare, too!
I wish you had shared it, Karen. If you had, you would have found that, while a freak-out is normal, so is seeing little abnormalities on mammos that turn out to be nothing. They HAVE to be sure and can’t tell you its going to be ok, because every once in awhile it isn’t. I have been through this 3x and my heart always beats out my chest even though I have cysts and dense breast tissue, etc. my sister even had to have the ultrasound once, as did two of my friends.
You would have found out just how commonplace this is. I am so sorry you went through this awfulness without more support because you were scared. I am also soooo happy for you and your family that you’re okay.
A belated ((((HUG)))).
I personally think your sharing this story is fantastic. One of my very close friends was diagnosed with breast cancer when her baby was only 3 months old. It was rough, and there were a lot of tears. But after 6 months of treatment she is now 100% better. Early detection is SO SO important.
Thank you for sharing.
I’ll still hug you when I see you at BlogU. I’ll be gentle and careful, but you’re not getting out of a hug that easy.
So glad it wasn’t breast cancer. Sorry about your t*t cysts but glad it’s not worse.
Had a similar experience with stupid “abnormal” pap results- twice. Thank you Dr. I’m-going-to-test-everything-that-doesn’t-look-exactly-like-my-textbook.
I’m so happy that you A) do not have breast cancer, B) that you used the word “douchenuggets” and made me laugh my a*s off after all the let’s-not-cry-while-blog-reading-at-work.
I’M glad you are ok. Keep on top of it. Heck, get a second opinion even if you feel more comfy. I had a cyst when I was a teenager. In my twenties, I finally got it removed. It was benign. I found a great breast doctor and just kept going. Ultrasounds are good. I know someone who’s mammogram did not pick up breast cancer but the ultrasound did…..the same day too.
So thankful it was just cysts! My heart was in my throat the whole time I was reading. Thank you for sharing!!!
came home from work on a Friday (of a long weekend) to a message to call for a repeat mammogram and ultrasound~worst long weekend ever! turned out to be the big-a*s mole on my breast. had exactly the same thought process as you, and replayed that message a jillion times over the weekend trying to make some sense of it. so glad you’re ok. my heart goes out to everyone who gets a positive devastating diagnosis.
So glad you are ok, but you are so right. Some people will go through this and not be. Am sitting here sobbing now. Thank you for writing it so bluntly and perfectly. You nailed it.
This is amazingly appropriate for this time in my life. Exactly one week ago I had a 6 month mammo, only to be put back in the waiting room for a 2nd mammo for a questionable spot on one side, then to be put back in the waiting room for an ultrasound to look a little closer at a thickened spot. During the ultrasound I could see the tech focusing on one circular area – measuring it and taking multiple pics. I then sat in the darkened ultrasound room, wiping away the tears falling out of my scared shitless eyes, trying to keep my cool, for the l o n g e s t 15 minutes of my life, while the doctor
reviewed the pics. It is just a cyst. It was definitely a terrifying experience, and I walked out of there looking a wreck with my make up half way down my face from crying (thanks for nothing ultrasound tech girl, you could have let me know!) I’m so grateful my booby is cyst-y and nothing else. I send strength and love to those that have not had such comforting results!
so so glad it was good news!!!! (now go hug those little douchenuggets)
Glad you’re ok after such a worrying experience. Unfortunately after finding a lump I received the bad news that I had breast cancer at age 31. I ended up waiting 2 months for a clear diagnosis, which was torturous. At least once you know what you’re dealing with you can try and do something about it. Knowledge is power! Thankfully it was caught early and I’m now 8 years on. So the message here is early detection can make all the difference. Get checked for anything suspicious and always go back if recalled, even if you are shitting bricks!!! Xx
You should be tested for the BRCA 1/2 gene. You need to go. With your history it is VERY likely you carry the BRCA1 or 2 breast cancer gene.With that cancer in your family ( your insurance company WILL pay for your genetic testing) because this gene is a killer and you NEED TO GO ASAP. My younger sister was BRCA1+ and she went for a mammo and was dx’d with breast cancer. While she was under anesthesia for the mastectomy they also discovered stage 4 ovarian cancer. She fought like a tiger and finally they tested her and she popped it and told me to get tested. Then she died November 18 2015 and I popped the test as well so my insurance company fell all over themselves to pay for a preventative hysterectomy that instead revealed stage 2-C Ovarian and Uterine cancer. High Grade Serous Carcinoma–it’s the most aggressive and virulent gynecological cancer there is–it’s what we BRCA1 girls get. While it is 1.24% of ALL cancer cases, 34% of the victims are BRCA1 or BRCA2 positive.
GO GET TESTED!!! TELL YOUR DOCTOR YOU THINK YOU MAY CARRY THE BRCA (BRACKA) GENE. YOU LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT!!!!!! Mine did.
I went through almost exactly the same thing two years ago. I even KNEW it was relating to a benign cyst I have had since college. My mom had breast cancer at 38 (I am older than that now). I told myself over and over and over it was probably nothing. My brain still went to that place where my kids were saying goodbye to me just like in Terms of Endearment. I am sorry that you went through this, but glad you are spreading the word.
UUuggghh, I was bawling the entire time. I am so glad to read that it is just a cyst. We are going through the other scenario right now with my sister in law. Diagnosed at 38 metastasized breast cancer with a then 18 month old son. Single mom. Her oncologist’s goal at that time was to get her to see her son start kindergarten. He starts in August. She seems to have timed things out very accurately. And needless to say, our hearts are breaking.
Thank you a trillion times for sharing this story, you are reminding SO MANY women to be on top of things. Self exams, mammograms, regular doctors visits. All these things are essential. Please ladies don’t skip or tell yourself it’s nothing.
Karen, you just explained the EXACT same situation as mine except mine was with my first mammo. I had all the EXACT same thoughts throughout the process. Bedtime the night of the call was full of hugs and me crying behind smiles. I had to call my husband as well. It is an experience that makes you appreciate what you have and also think of all those who didn’t get the same all clear. Thanks for sharing this. I am participating in the Avon walk for breast cancer this weekend. It’s a great reminder as to why I do this to my feet.
Thank you for sharing! unfortunately at 36 I was one of the unlucky ones where the phone call was “you have breast cancer”. I’m In good shape after a double mastectomy and 6 months of chemo so no worries….
but you should NEVER feel guilty for sharing your positive results! I was so happy for you when I got to the end of your story. At first I was thinking you were going to make us wait with you … Like your appt was today at 12:45… Then I thought A. She would not do that (like this was about us) and B. Today is Tuesday!!! D**n holidays! Thank you for reminding. People that early detection is key, that mammograms are important before the age of 50, and that you’re human if you worry but more often then not the results are in your favor!!!
You should be tested for the BRCA 1/2 gene. You need to go. With your family history it is possibly likely you carry the BRCA1 or 2 breast cancer gene. (your insurance company WILL pay for your genetic testing) because this gene is a killer and you NEED TO GO ASAP. My younger sister was BRCA1+ and she went for a mammo and was dx’d with breast cancer. While she was under anesthesia for the mastectomy they also discovered stage 4 ovarian cancer. She fought like a tiger and finally they tested her and she popped it and told me to get tested. Then she died November 18 2015 and I popped the test as well so my insurance company fell all over themselves to pay for a preventative hysterectomy that instead revealed stage 2-C Ovarian and Uterine cancer. High Grade Serous Carcinoma–it’s the most aggressive and virulent gynecological cancer there is–it’s what we BRCA1 girls get. While it is 1.24% of ALL cancer cases, 34% of the victims are BRCA1 or BRCA2 positive.
GO GET TESTED!!! TELL YOUR DOCTOR YOU THINK YOU MAY CARRY THE BRCA (BRACKA) GENE. YOUR LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT!!!!!!
You just described me a few weeks ago. Even went as far as a biopsy. Doc told me if it was the worst that we caught is very early. Results negative!!! My prayers to God at that time were pretty much, “If you are going to do this s**t to me you’d better rain down a f**k load of strenght to go with it!” Sorry about the language. Thanks for sharing.
Apparently there was evidence published a while back that mammograms trigger breast cancer, theres now a new machine that doesnt cause it & the breasts dont get squashed. Its not called a mammogram, its safer, much more accurate because lots of cancer gets missed with mammos & if u diddnt have any u might have it with your next 1( because it caused it) i heard about it, didnt see the article myself.
Thank you so much for sharing! I’m so glad you are ok! And everything you said is so true!
Really glad you did decide to share. Glad everything is all good. Love reading your posts and book! I’m not a mom as of yet …We are still in TTC phase but I feel like this is more true and honest preparation for if it happens for us than any other books I’ve read. Thank you so much!
This happens to me every single year. I’ve needed yearly mammograms and ultrasounds since I turned 35 (family history, dense breast tissue, history of cysts, etc). When I got the call last September for the repeat mammogram (like you, on a Friday afternoon and had to wait it out until Monday), my heart sank and I cried for days (out of sight of my kids). And like you, it turned out to be cysts. As much as I hate getting the girls smashed into pancakes every year, I think about my aunt, who was 30 years ago when she was diagnosed and 33 when she died. Be grateful and thankful that it wasn’t cancer.
You should be tested for the BRCA 1/2 gene. You need to go. With your family history it is VERY likely you carry the BRCA1 or 2 breast cancer gene.With that cancer in your family ( your insurance company WILL pay for your genetic testing) because this gene is a killer and you NEED TO GO ASAP. My younger sister was BRCA1+ and she went for a mammo and was dx’d with breast cancer. While she was under anesthesia for the mastectomy they also discovered stage 4 ovarian cancer. She fought like a tiger and finally they tested her and she popped it and told me to get tested. Then she died November 18 2015 and I popped the test as well so my insurance company fell all over themselves to pay for a preventative hysterectomy that instead revealed stage 2-C Ovarian and Uterine cancer. High Grade Serous Carcinoma–it’s the most aggressive and virulent gynecological cancer there is–it’s what we BRCA1 girls get. While it is 1.24% of ALL cancer cases, 34% of the victims are BRCA1 or BRCA2 positive.
GO GET TESTED!!! TELL YOUR DOCTOR YOU THINK YOU MAY CARRY THE BRCA (BRACKA) GENE. YOU LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT!!!!!!
I just love you! And I’m so glad you’re okay!!!!!
A good friend of mine died of breast cancer yesterday at age 44, leaving behind the sweetest husband in the world (aside from mine, of course) and two beautiful little boys. Thank you for sharing your story. I’m so glad that everything turned out okay for you–I don’t know what I’d do without my daily dose of BS!!
I was 25 when I was diagnosed. And now every time I have any issue at all the doctors do a million tests on me just to make sure I’m still good. It is always upsetting, but a relief to know that they are really looking out for you.
This is why I think it is disgusting that here in the UK screening is only done for women aged between 50 – 70 and then only once every 3 years!!!
Thank goodness everything was ok. I recently had a cancer scare, but mine was during a PAP smear. I can tell u its a giant relief to hear the test results are neg n your ok.
My more wonderful than life mother in law had breast cancer (officially in remission) but she goes in for a check up once a year and the whole family panics a little bit each time. Early detection is key so thank you! for sending out a reminder to everyone that touching yourself can save your life!
I just wanted to tell you thank you for sharing. My Mom went through this many years ago (ended up being calcium deposits) but she didn’t tell anyone until after she got the “good” news but it scared the crap out of me even knowing she was OK. I’m still “young” enough that it isn’t mandatory for me but I do make sure to check mine out frequently like I’m supposed to. My husband also volunteers for this job (big eye roll) but I’m glad he does because he’d probably feel a difference before I did and you are right when you say early detection is huge. I love your blog and your humor but I appreciate you also sharing the not so funny even though I’m sure it was hard. Thanks for all you write and keeping me smiling pretty much daily.
Thanks for sharing, I had to have a biopsy last fall after the mamo and ultrasound and I was all about getting it done. It was right before Thanksgiving so I was worried I would have to wait longer for the results but I got the all clear the day before. Needless to say I was exta thankful and still try to remember not to take things for granted. Oh, and I had already made my peace with saying goodby to the boobies should there have been something there. No hesitation and hubby was onboard as well. So glad your situation turned out on the positive side!!!
Do you still go for follow ups?
Thanks for sharing! Praying for the person who sent you her question! My sister went through almost the same thing. She had her first mammogram. Then was called back in for a repeat and then several ultra sounds, then a biopsy. All while going through a divorce. Thankfully everything was all good! Check your boobies and don’t wait if you find something!
This hits very close to home. Ten years ago I had this exact experience and was told I had “lumpy, cystic breasts” from drinking caffeine. Fast forward to October 2013, and I was diagnosed with stage 4 breast cancer in the exact same spot. I had no inherent risk factors and was asymptomatic, and here I am, fighting for the rest of my life. Thank you for posting; I hope it leads others to get tested…often.
They didn’t know about BRCA1 in 2013–go get tested. I was + and had a hysterectomy to prevent ovarian and it was too late–I had stage 2-C ovarian AND uterine cancer and my kid sister who was also BRCA1+ died of ovarian, breast and uterine cancer 90 days before I was diagnosed. If I had waited until June (now) to have the surgery, I would also be terminal. Ovarian cancer has NO symptoms until it is TOO LATE. I was totally asymptomatic and my CA-125 test result was 16 when my sister’s was 946. (Normal is 0-35) I sat on that table at the gyno office with him wrist deep in my stuff telling him and my husband that they were wasting their time and mine with this ridiculous surgery. I had to eat those words and then I had to call my parents who are still devastated over the death of my sister and tell them that they might have to bury another child. If that wasn’t the worst call I’ve ever had to make, it will do until it comes along.
Scary S**t! I had discovered a lump in my breast when I was 18, and ended up having two surgeries with in a year to have it tested and removed! Everything turned out fine, but it was almost a whole year before I got a final answer, due to the lump growing quickly after the first surgery!
Karen, I am so happy for you that it was nothing, in the end. The wait must have been horrible. I’m sorry that you had to go through that. I feel for every woman that has to go through that, and then a lot not getting good news. My grama is a 25 year breast cancer survivor, diagnosed 28 years ago. I applaud the women wo fight and survive and grieve for the women who fight and lose.
I got that call this morning. This is my second mammogram and I got the call back last time too (and it took them months to finally actually tell me anything about my benign fibroadenoma). There has to be a better way.
Wow thank you. I have not had this scare but so many other medical scares. I remember wanting to scream shut up to a full waiting room. I mean did they not see I had just survived the impossible and now might have something new that would kill me. Walking the halls and thinking this could be my last healthy walk. I even thought about not showing up because it might be easier to die not knowing why. The things that run through your head is enough to make you crazy. The truth is if we fight we may all not survive but at least we give it one hell of a try.
I’m so glad for you that it turned out to be minor! I got a call back after my last pap for inconclusive results and had the very same thoughts as you did. I cried and freaked out and had a few thousand panic attacks. My mom had cervical cancer at 31 years old and I’m 29 so I freaked out extra. Thankfully it turned out to be minor as well but I will be d**n sure to never miss another test!!!
Just went through the same. Age 24 and I’ve had to have a double mastectomy. You can never be too young so listen to your doctors.
You made me cry. I wish I could hug you.There’s not a day that goes by that I don’t think of my mom, lost her to breast cancer, she was 68 & battled the cancer monster for over 20 years. It’s always in the forefront of my mind. I’m 55 & have 2 girls and I can’t say how important Dr. visit’s are. I’m sorry you had to go thru that. It’s like a dream, actions and words go slo-mo, you can’t think, breathing takes effort… that’s when my mom told me she had it. I can’t even begin to imagine how she felt. Take care & get a second opinion please. Mom’s first Dr. told her the lump she found was a hardened milk gland & nothing to worry about. Not till a couple years passed & a new Dr. exam did she get confirmation it was cancer all along. Will keep you in my thought’s & prayers ♥
It’s scary hearing that news at any age! I had a scare about 10 years ago but turned out fine. And add the ‘not covered under insurance currently because of a glitch’ thing! I hate insurance loop holes that they hide behind to get out of covering you!!! Thank God everything came back ok! Just found a site that’s interesting, http://www.thetruthaboutcancer.com. Check it out! It’s all about education ourselves and being our own best health advocate! I decided to get healthier about 20 months ago and feel great! Finally found an easy program that was easy to follow! Now I know that I’m doing whatever I can to avoid the C word! We never know though… God be with all of you that are struggling!
That website saved my life. I did the RSO protocol for ovarian (I’m BRCA1+) and my sister (also BRCA1) did chemo and conventional for her ovarian cancer. I am cancer free. We buried her in November 2015.
Thank you for this! Your bravery may save a life! My sister just had a double mastectomy, last month, at 47. She never got a mammogram because mine were clear! Our grandmother died of it. Please check your boobies. Every. D**n. Year!!
Interesting you posted this now. Memorial Day weekend 19 years ago I felt a lump. I had 3 children, aged 7, 5 and 2. I had to wait until Tuesday to call the doctor. I went to his office, and he felt the lump. Since I was only 34 he said, surely it’s nothing but we can’t ignore it. He said I needed a mammogram (only 34, too young to have already had one). I had to wait again. I called the mammographer crying, and she got me in as soon as possible. 45 minutes after I got back to work, the doctor’s office called. Saw something on the mammogram, need to get a needle biopsy. Wait again… days later I had a needle biopsy. Nurse said “It’s our lucky day, clear fluid. But we need to send it off to be sure.” My mother and sister sent me flowers that day. I cried and cried because I was so relieved. Two weeks later, on a Friday, I went back for my follow up appointment. I had breast cancer. Doc said that it was the first time in 12 years that he had seen clear fluid came back positive for breast cancer. That Tuesday I had the tumor removed and sent off for further testing. My prognosis was not good, although it had not spread to my lymph nodes which was the best news. A week later, on my 14th wedding anniversary, I had a mastectomy. Then the regimen of chemotherapy and radiation began. My last chemo was March 12, almost 10 months after I initially found my lump. I wouldn’t wish the worry (before, during and after) on my worst enemy. The thought of my children losing their mother, my husband losing his wife, my mother losing her daughter, my siblings losing their sister, on and on… was really hard. Now I worry about the increased risk for my daughters. Thank you for sharing your story. Although your ending was different (thankfully) than mine, the emotions felt are the same. Early detection is most definitely the best chance at surviving. I’m living proof.
I’m the 5 year old in this story. I currently have 5 year old twins and am terrified of having to go through this…and even more so that my daughter might have to one day. I’m thankful that I grew up knowing my mom fought to stay here for us…..I’m happy she was able to beat cancer and continues to tolerate and fight through other diseases to be an amazing mom, grandma, sister, daughter, and wife.
I love you mom!
Have you thought about genetic testing? Is there anyone else in your family that has had breast or ovarian cancer? Your grandmother dying at 49 is pretty young…I’m BRCA1+ and have had yearly mammograms and MRI’s since the age of 25 (so for about 10 years now). I’ll be having the same surgery as Angelina in the next couple of years. I’m glad you’re going in every year for a mammogram, early detection really is key!
Go have your surgery NOW do NOT wait. It is SOOO much easier to prevent cancer than to treat it, this gene is a killer and you NEED TO GO ASAP. My younger sister was BRCA1+ and she went for a mammo and was dx’d with breast cancer. While she was under anesthesia for the mastectomy they also discovered stage 4 ovarian cancer. She fought like a tiger and finally they tested her and she popped it and told me to get tested. Then she died November 18 2015 and I popped the test as well so my insurance company fell all over themselves to pay for a preventative hysterectomy that instead revealed stage 2-C Ovarian and Uterine cancer. High Grade Serous Carcinoma–it’s the most aggressive and virulent gynecological cancer there is–it’s what we BRCA1 girls get. While it is 1,24% of ALL cancer cases, 34% of the victims are BRCA1 or BRCA2 positive–and 78% of BRCA1/2 carriers get High Grade Serous Carcinoma. Get your surgery now. YOUR LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT! I was TOTALLY asymptomatic–NOTHING. My CA-125 (Cancer Antigen 125 for those who are late to this post) was 16. My sister’s was 968. Normal is 0-35. My husband literally DRAGGED me from our winter home in Louisiana to the frozen tundra in Illinois in FEBRUARY to have this surgery. I told him I’d come up in June and have it then. He said NO WAY which led to a rather bad quarrel which are extremely rare in our marriage and I gave in. He saved my life when I was thinking he was being rather dickish about it. This cancer we get, HGSC DOUBLES IN SIZE EVERY 5 WEEKS. When it gets to be 3 cm it starts shedding cells into the naturally occurring fluid in your pelvis where they invade the omentum. You don’t know something is wrong until your omentum is totally turned to omental cake and there’s so many cancer cells that your lymph nodes are clogged and your belly starts to swell because the fluid–running through your entire body with BILLIONS of cancer cells and you bloat and start getting abdominal pain because your omentum is all tumor and pressing on your bladder, bowels and colon. Once your HCGS starts shedding cells, you are going to die because they stud the inside of your peritoneum with cancer deposits that look like a clove studded ham. You are stage 3 or higher before you know something is wrong. I can give you a link to my sister’s obituary. She saved my life by telling me to get tested and she was the reason I let my husband force me to do the surgery in Feb. My tumors were half the size they needed to be to start blowing cells through my pelvis which means they would have started seeding my peritoneum the second week in March. By now I would be at least stage 3A with a 12% chance of survival. I am currently cancer free, but the survival rate for stage 2C which is JUST before stage 3 is 21% It was THAT CLOSE. I still might die from this because the recurrence rate is 83% but right now I did the RSO protocol and my 60 day MRI w/wo contrast was clean. My 120 day MRI is coming up and if it is clean I just might be able to take a breath. I break out in a cold sweat when I think about this. If John hadn’t insisted and backed it up till I backed down, I would be terminal right NOW. That’s how close it was, literally in the nick of time–and hopefully it won’t come back. I hope that is the case because I refused chemo in favor of RSO but I’m holding my breath. Feel free to contact me. I’m on AOL same name as here–which is my real name, obs.
By the way–we are distantly related somehow–we have to be with the same genetic defect and we’re related to Angie too!! LOL
Thank you for sharing Karen. I was right there with you, such a good writer. I’m so glad you don’t have the big “C”.
Thank you for sharing this, and thank you for being you. I was diagnosed at 31 just before I got married. I was also a radiology tech, so I knew enough to be able to see what was on the screens. I was told by the radiologist doing the exams that surely, since I was so young, and the symptoms were so silly (I found the lump because it was painful, and big, and had gotten from nothing to the size of a walnut in 6-7 months) that it was benign and related to my periods. It was not benign. I have lost so many warrior friends to this disease. I’m one of the lucky ones. I’m 10 yrs out. I’m glad you’re ok.
I’m so glad you’re ok and thanks for sharing your story.
Thank you so much for sharing this personal and terrifying story with us. Hell YES to all being good!! We all love you, Karen, and will walk with you through any journey that you allow us access to.
Petition your hospital for a ‘no sleepless nights’ program. It may mean getting bumped while you are waiting for your annual mammogram, but it means a woman who had results like your can be rescanned immediately so as not to go through what you went through whole waiting. So sorry for your experience but glad it was benign!
Babysideburns, you are amazeballs. Seriously. I was literally crossing my toes from the minute I read your posting title, and thanking God when I read all turned out good. You had me at near-tears to LMAO’ing at “douchenuggets” (I thought I only said that, lol!), all the while teaching a valuable lesson in maintaining control of your own health and the importance of an annual exam and recommended testing. As a nurse on the women’s health field and as a mommy in the 35+ age group, I say Thanks, Babysideburns for brightening my day once again, and I am ever-so-grateful that all is well in your world again.
I so much needed this post today. Last week I found a lump in my chest that was a size of a golf ball. Went to my OB/GYN and she got me in that next day (very unusual). Then, she called and demanded for a mammogram/ultra sound to be performed that day (scared shitless at this point). I went and sure enough the lump was a cyst. However, they did spot something else and said it needed to have a biopsy because they couldn’t tell. So, I’ve been sitting on pins and needles for the last week (had to get all the pre-certifcations done for the insurance) and it will be performed this upcoming Monday. So, THANK YOU, THANK YOU for your blog.
I play this little game nearly every time I get a mammogram, called back in, another mgram, ultra sound and a cheerful “Nothing to worry about”. I’ve been through it at least 6 times now, it’s getting old and tiresome. I know, better safe than sorry, blah, blah, blah, but I am really getting tired of wasting time again and again. Hope this doesn’t become a yearly ordeal for any of you.
Wonderfully honest and genuine an I LOVE IT
Please keep your insight and ability to communicate at a very real and personable manner at full speed. There are so many that benefit from your gifts…even the negative nellies.
Glad you’re all good! I unfortunatly know what it’s like to get the bad news. Only mine was lung cancer (41y/o non smoker) and brain metastisis. It sucks! You always think it’s supposed to be someone else! But I’m doing good and I live my life day to day. I laugh, I cry. But I have great friends and family supporting me. I got cancer but it ain’t gettin me!!!
Glad you are all good and great message at the end too! Get your mammograms ladies!!!!
I could have written this post. Exact. Same. Experience. (Except for the fact that I started to cry _before_ I found out I needed to go in for the ultrasound.) I wish I had known ahead of time how common this was. My baseline at 35 showed nothing. 7 yrs and twins later, cysts galore, huge white spots, major panic.
Thank you for sharing and glad it was nothing.
I went through a similar string of feelings when I had a lump that required a mammogram. I still obsess about whether or not they missed something. More terrified of not being there for my kids then actually dying. Thank you so much for sharing.
We love you. So glad you’re ok.
I am 33. Diagnosed three months ago. Lost my brother and now my mother to this disease. I know your fear. I also applaud you for writing about it. To see someone like you face it…and then be grateful and understand what those of us who do not get good results go through…it is just inspiring. Thank you for getting the word out. And am so gald it is nothing.
Thank you for sharing! I think it’s so important for women to get checked. I’m really glad yours turned out to be cysts and nothing more serious.
Well it happened to us but I was pregnant with our 4th child. .. it was b**t cancer and my husband’s not mine…. it takes 3 weeks to get diagnosed it was stage 2 but he went to the Dr before 6 months before and he said it was hemmroids stupid Dr. It would have only been stage 1 if the Dr found it in time. Anyway thanks to modern medicine I still have my husband. … that year really sucked though
If cancer runs in his family, he should be tested for BRCA1/2 as colon cancer is what men get along with pancreatic and breast cancer. If he pops it your kids need to be tested as well as it does not dilute, your kids have a 50% chance og being BRCA if one parent is and 100% if both are.With that cancer (your insurance company WILL pay for your genetic testing) because this gene is a killer and hub NEEDS TO GO ASAP. My younger sister was BRCA1+ and she went for a mammo and was dx’d with breast cancer. While she was under anesthesia for the mastectomy they also discovered stage 4 ovarian cancer. She fought like a tiger and finally they tested her and she popped it and told me to get tested. Then she died November 18 2015 and I popped the test as well so my insurance company fell all over themselves to pay for a preventative hysterectomy that instead revealed stage 2-C Ovarian and Uterine cancer. High Grade Serous Carcinoma–it’s the most aggressive and virulent gynecological cancer there is–it’s what we BRCA1 girls get. While it is 1,24% of ALL cancer cases, 34% of the victims are BRCA1 or BRCA2 positive.
GO GET TESTED!!! TELL YOUR DOCTOR YOU THINK YOU MAY CARRY THE BRCA (BRACKA) GENE. YOU LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT!!!!!
Later today, I’ll be going in for my repeat mammogram. I’ve spent the last four days (since I found out I needed it) doing very little except internet searches, crying, telling myself I’m overreacting, and doing anything to get my mind off it. Aside from the fear, I’ve arrived mostly at anger that so many women are needlessly put through this, some of them multiple times. There are ways to eliminate the wait time (No Sleepless Nights programs) so women don’t have to be terrified unnecessarily. Unfortunately, we accept this as “the way it is” without demanding that it be changed. Karen, it looks like thousands of people have shared your post on Facebook. I hope the pain and fear you felt resonated with even a fraction of those who read the post, and makes them angry enough to want to change how mammograms are handled – even if it’s just at their local clinic – so more women don’t have to go through what you did.
Im glad your okay, im reading this while breastfeeding my daughter tears streaming down my face great read
One of your best posts ever. Thank you.
it is personal and yet it is so important too. i pinned it on Pintrest too. because i would have had the same exact reaction. i hate waiting for medical answers or tests or results.
The best you’ve ever written. I had to temporarily stop reading at times to gather myself!! Time for book 2???!!!!!
Thank you for deciding to share!!
Thank you for sharing. I love to laugh (and now cry) with you. You are awesome and you keep us Mommies going each day. I am so glad everything turned out ok!
Hi Karen. It’s Kerry s. I’m so glad you are okay. I went through the same exact thing a year and a half ago and had to have surgery to remove the cyst. Luckily it wasn’t anything, but if I left it there, it could have developed into something. It’s great that you’re sharing. Mammograms suck (especially if you aren’t very voluptuous…). Might be worse than pushing. My second (James) came about after my celebratory “I don’t have cancer” night out… And three glasses of wine. Take care lady. Miss you!!
Isn’t this interesting … I have my follow up / re-do mammogram this Monday. And I’m planning to do a blog post about it. Hopefully I can just write “click on this link to read what happened to me–just substitute Jen for Karen.”
Glad you’ve got cysts. Sure better than anything else!!
Hi Karen – It was great to meet you at BlogU and I have such respect for you for all of your accomplishments. I am so glad that this was just a scare. I am a breast cancer survivor, and the news after my mammogram wasn’t good – it was cancer. I turned a horrible experience of surviving breast cancer into a blog and a book (or two or now three soon) and listening to you reminded me of why I started writing in the first place. To give all women hope and inspiration. Thank you for the renewed faith in my writing. And blessings for continued good health. Hugs, Holly
Wow. That was a little cray cray. Glad everything worked out. And you’re right – take nothing for granted. Great meeting you at Blog U.
First, I just finished reading your “I Heart My LIttle A-Holes” and really enjoyed it. As an occasional (former) Daddy blogger myself, it’s nice to have a spelling and usage reference for all those “hoo-ha / v******y -like” words. 😉
Anyway, my wife was called back for a repeat mammogram plus ultrasound. Unlike your outcome, the radiologist recommended a biopsy. But with all the other more immediate medical issues, we’re too overwhelmed to go through with it.
I agree with Greg, they’re just being extra careful. Plus, if someone comes in with really good insurance, I think they’ll use as much of it as they can. Otherwise all that expensive imaging equipment (almost wrote “imagining” there) will sit idle while they’re still making payments on it.
All the best!
So glad I remembered you writing about this a couple of mo ago. I am currently in the “limbo” stage of awaiting my US, thank God for some Xanax I keep around for such emergencies! I have cancelled my hair appt for this week (maybe won’t need to worry about my roots for awhile) and called every friend that I have with boobs! Your blog, however, was the most help. Thank you, ladies, and good luck to all!
My “irregular” mamogram results were given to me Friday, and my Ultrasound is tomorrow. I know this post is months old but as I lay here stressing to where I can’t sleep, it couldn’t have hit my news feed at a better time. Thank you.
Monica, I hope everything is okay. I have to say that since I wrote this, I can’t tell you how many people have told me they had exactly the same experience. SOOOOO many false alarms. I’d rather have a false alarm and be check thoroughly though! I wish you tons of good luck tomorrow.
Thanks. It runs on both sides of my family. I lost my mom’s mom a year ago, and my mom had a preventative mascecotomy for precancerous cells 6 years ago. My dad’s sister died of it in June, and a cousin was diagnosed 6 weeks ago. So in a way I feel like a ticking time bomb already
Then good for you for getting checked out. Scary history so I’m glad you’re on top of it. And these days there are all sorts of options. Best of luck. Hang in there.
It’s freak out worthy. I get that. But there is much to be thankful for including all of us who are here to support you! My sister and dear friend both had double mastectomies and chemo and in one case radiation and reconstruction in the last four years. I had a scare two years ago.
You can do this.
If it’s malignant make sure to get a good patient advocate. Take someone with you to each appointment to be your u set of ears, your sounding board and to ask questions you might not have thought of, write your questions down before you go, don’t be afraid to ask for a second or third opinion.
LL
Thank you so much for sharing. It’s 3ish in the AM..I have an app at 945 because I noticed something different going on. I’m so scared, so incredibly scared, so I appreciate knowing I’m not the only one who freaks out. I’m glad everything is all good for you!!! Gives me hope!!!
I wish you tons of luck this morning Alicia!!! Hugs! Hang in there.
I am with you. Go..Find out! Then be prepared to fight if necessary.
I am currently waiting for my ultrasound results after an abnormal mammogram. I am 46 years old and went for a routine mammogram and received a letter a week later stating that I needed an ultrasound. I asked the technician if she could tell me anything and she said she wasn’t allowed. I also called the receptionist at my doctor’s office, she also couldn’t give me any info and told me to wait for my doctor to call.
I’m trying to have faith that nothing is wrong, but I am so worried. I have been through so much lately. In January, 2013, I went into the hospital and was in a coma for 13 days. I woke up in the critical care unit and found out that my right leg had been amputated below the knee. While in a coma I nearly died, I was not expected to live. I had over 20 blood clots in my foot. Surgery was done on my foot but gangrene developed and amputation was necessary to save my life. I also developed pneumonia and my organs began to fail. After a month, I was released but the doctor failed to give me blood thinners. After 8 days, more clots developed and surgery was needed to remove those clots. From that surgery, I developed the potentially deadly virus MRSA. In order to save my life from this disease, I had to have the MRSA removed by amputating above it, making me an above the knee amputee. I was hospitalized and in nursing homes for 4 months.
My life has forever changed. I lost my job, my home, my entire life savings and most of my belongings because I was unable to move them from my home. I am a single parent raising my 7 year old grandson.
As if all of that wasnt enough, I just had kidney cancer. Luckily, it was found quickly and on 9/29/14, I had surgery and they were able to remove ALL of the cancer. Now, I sit by the phone waiting to find out if I have breast cancer.
I am so very happy for you and that you are healthy. I will pray for your continued good health.
Thank you for sharing.
Mary Ingles
Cincinnati, Oh
I’m going through the same right now. Just had my ultrasound. Was nothing but my boobs are swollen and waked with lumps.. it’s scary. Good to be self aware.
Thank you for posting this. I just had a biopsy today and I am very scared. I’ve had benign issues in the past so hopefully it’s nothing but still so upsetting.
I’ll cross my fingers and toes for you LM!! It’s scary but chances are it’s fine. Just keep reminding yourself that.
Thank you for your well wishes! It was a fibroadenoma which is benign. Thank you for writing about this scary waiting period that so many women face.
I am SOOOOOOO glad to hear that LM!!!
I just found out today I have cancer. I never thought it would happen to me, not because I am special or anything but because I have very little breast tissue of my own. Kind of numb right now.
Oh AFS, I am so sorry. I don’t even know you but I teared up when I read this. Okay, you are going to do what the doctors say and you are going to kick cancer’s a*s. Seriously, let this asshole know that it messed with the wrong person. I’m sending you all of my positive thoughts right now and lots of virtual hugs. Reach out whenever you need to.
How can I help? really…..I know way too much about breast cancer…My mom died of breast cancer, my only sister is a survivor….In my mind I am in the when not if category.
Do you have a good support system?
Besides the diagnosis what do you know?
When is your next appointment? Is it with a surgeon? Or oncologist?
I am happy to help.
Lisa
Thank you ladies. I went to a surgeon yesterday. Nice that they got me in so quickly. They said early stages so it looks promising but I will know more after the MRI and genetic testing are completed in about 2 weeks. It’s apparently the easiest kind to cure so all promising. Just a weird feeling.
That is all GREAT news. I mean I know it sucks big time to have cancer, but these days it is so treatable. My best friend tested positive for the gene after getting breast cancer and while it wasn’t an easy road, she’s been healthy now for well over five years. You’re going to do awesome.
Oddly, no one in my family ever had it. My dad died of prostate cancer at 57 which is why they want to do the genetic testing. I guess if you test positive for the gene(s), you might treat it differently due to the risk of recurrence.
YEAH for quick appointments! LOVE that they got you in so quickly and that you know it is very early stages. This is good news! Breast cancer is very curable.
Consider your options, that they will likely offer you at your next appointment…lumpectomy, mastectomy, double mastectomy and the reconstruction that goes with it if you choose. Believe law requires insurance to pay for reconstruction. My sister, based on our family history opted for double mastectomy and reconstruction, she had chemo but no radiation and never looked back.
Again, I am here and happy to help!
Thankyou :).
I had a similar conversation with the radiologist three hours ago – I am glad that I came across your post – so helpful to have this perspective.
Good luck Darnell. Remember, lots of people here to help and offer support.
I couldn’t read through all of the comments and although I do not have breast cancer I can relate to the wait. I’m 28 and on January 5th I was told I have cervical ca. I had to wait 2 weeks to meet with my obgyn oncologist. The next week I had a biopsy which he told me I’d get the results in 7 days. I waited 9. Due to a lengthy distance (4.5 hrs) he gave me my results over the phone. It has invaded a blood vessel and the tumor was bigger and more aggressive than they were expecting. So now what??? Wait 1 month from the date of surgery to have an MRI and PET scan… JUST TO GET A STAGE AND TREATMENT PLAN. I work in health care so I get the reasoning of having to heal before I can have my scans but then why not do the scans first??? So in 3 days I will finally get my scans and then meet with the doctor and hopefully get a treatment plan because as of right now it could be any number of things. I have a 10 yr old who can not understand why I keep going trips during the week and a father who just lost his wife of 30 yrs of ca 2 yrs and 2 weeks ago so it is kind of like deja vu. The waiting has made me almost stoic about it…like it is a cold that will just go away because I am not doing anything about it.
F**K cancer and F**K waiting!!
Ugh. I went thought this last year at 36. Unfortunately mine was breast cancer. I have a 1 and 3 year old so it has been the longest year ever! Luckily + 1 year – 2 breasts and 2 nipples…I am finally in the clear. My family history is terrible (mother, both grandmothers, 3 aunts etc.) so for anyone else with this history join a surveillance program. It saved my life and I will have my daughters join one someday as well. Also, mine did not show on a mammogram or ultrasound. MRI is best if you are unsure! Glad to hear you are ok! Your book helped me laugh through it all. So thanks 🙂
I Just saw this after reading another post. My doctor recently found a nodule on my thyroid that is solid and is more concerning. I was going to have to wait 6 months before a rescan. He moved it up to 4 months because of the size concern. I was at a 2 and he’s concerned when it reaches 2.5. So now we wait…. I think waiting is the worst part of the process
I am totally relating to this story right now. In 2011, on my birthday I felt a lump in my left breast. I couldn’t even breathe at that point. I called my gyro and she had me go right in for a mammogram. It ended up being a cyst that they drained. Everything else came back fine. I felt so bad being happy for me because weeks earlier a friend of mine found out she had breast cancer (she was in her early 30’s). Anyway, 2013, cyst back, mammogram normal, cyst drained. 2015, cyst is back yet again, so on March 4, 2015 I go in for a mammogram. The girl is doing the mammo and tells me if they find anything they will call me and if not they will send a letter. She tells me the cyst is in the same spot so they will probably send a letter saying I can make an appointment to have it drained again if I so wish. So after the test she’s typing on the computer and says “um, they will probably be calling you back” I swallowed hard and said why, is everything not ok? She said “I’m not the radiologist but you will probably get a call” my mind was exploding. So then when I got up to leave she turned around and said ok well have a good day, then she sort of paused, and said “oh let me hug you” and gave me a big squeeze! I was like….OMG I’m dying! My mom was with me and said it was probably because of my cyst…which btw, it is visible just by looking a my breast due to my breasts being extremely thinned out from losing so much weight from gastric bypass in 2009. So I thought, my moms probably right. So the next morning at 8:30 am I get the call….we need you to come back in. I said what is wrong? She said the radiologist found questionable tissue on your right breast. Every muscle in my body went numb. I was like right breast! What?! So she said the soonest appointment is Tuesday March 10th. I’m thinking….a freaking week away! So here I am waiting, sick to my stomach….lying awake every night thinking the worst! It’s Friday now and I don’t know if my heart is going to make it til Tuesday. I’m 42 and and so scared about not seeing 43! The wait is the worst part right. I’m am so scared I can’t think straight!
First I’d call you dr to see if they have seen the mammogram. Maybe they can give you some indication of what’s going on so you can reduce your freak out status to the right level–yes I have been there and understand freak out but if it’s only the cyst that’s good….and your dr might be able to tell you that.
Then I’d call them TODAY and tell them you will be in on Monday for more testing. You will NOT wait for a Tuesday appointment.
I’d also question why the radiation tech told you anything!??!? She is not a radiologist. And she needs to learn, the hard way, to keep her mouth shut.
Then I’d be as calm as possible and enjoy the w/e as much as possible. Stay busy. Stay focused.
My sister lost a bunch of weight, was diagnosed with breast cancer, had a bilateral mastectomy and reconstruction and never looked back. Yes, some chemo too that kicked her b**t but she’s fine and she got new boobs that are great!
Please let me know if I can help. I know way too much about breast cancer and I can point you in the right direction if necessary.
To the young woman who wrote this article: My grandmother also died of breast cancer in her 40s when was 14 months old. I never knew her really. However, she gave me the gift that keeps on giving–the BRCA1+ germline mutation that gives one a 79% chance of breast or ovarian cancer or both. With that much cancer in your family (and I’m betting it was your PATERNAL grandma that died of it–just like mine) your insurance company WILL pay for your genetic testing and you NEED TO GO ASAP. My younger sister was BRCA1+ and she went for a mammo and was dx’d with breast cancer. While she was under anesthesia for the mastectomy they also discovered stage 4 ovarian cancer. She fought like a tiger and finally they tested her and she popped it and told me to get tested. Then she died November 18 2015 and I popped the test as well so my insurance company fell all over themselves to pay for a preventative hysterectomy that instead revealed stage 2-C Ovarian and Uterine cancer. High Grade Serous Carcinoma–it’s the most aggressive and virulent gynecological cancer there is–it’s what we BRCA1 girls get. While it is 1,24% of ALL cancer cases, 34% of the victims are BRCA1 or BRCA2 positive.
GO GET TESTED!!! TELL YOUR DOCTOR YOU THINK YOU MAY CARRY THE BRCA (BRACKA) GENE. YOU LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT!!!!!!
I’m writing a book about this since no one knows what BRCA1 is or the dangers. GET TESTED!!!
Literally I’m sitting in the dressing room now waiting on the radiologist to call my name, reading your story. Thank you soooo much for sharing because I’m freaking the f*ck out!!!! (Tears)…. I needed this, thank you!
I just went through this exact same scenario last April. Petrifying! All of the other women were told they were clear and could go home. “Mrs. Tate, we need you to stay for an ultrasound.” Thankfully I had the same outcome you did. It left me realizing that I take so much for granted. No matter what “bad thing” happened after that, I just thought, “That’s okay. I could have cancer, and I don’t. We’re good.” So thankful you are well!
I’m sobbing as I read this. I’m so happy you are okay. My twin sister passed away from metastatic breast cancer one year ago (on July 11th). Early detection IS key, and even though hers was detected early, it was very aggressive. She left behind a husband and two little kids, as well as a large family who loved her with every fiber of their beings. If you have dense breast tissue or a family history, don’t wait until you’re 40 and get a 3D mammogram (breast tomosynthesis). It will probably cost you an additional $100 since insurance rarely covers it, but it’s worth it for peace of mind. It can prevent those scary call backs every year. THANK YOU for sharing this…you may have just saved a life!
I am so sorry about your sister. Breast cancer sucks….my mom died of BC at 52, my sister is a survivor. I had BRCA testing and do not carry the gene but still expect to be diagnosed some day.
Have you heard of project 52? They donate and plant trees in memory of a child who has died or for a child who lost a parent. It’s very cool and free. I just did it for a friend who’s son died.
Thank you, Marion! My twin was tested for the BRCA genes when she was initially diagnosed and she did not carry the gene. We have four other sisters so this was a major concern.
I have not heard of project 52 but that’s a great idea. I planted a tree in my yard for my sister.
This EXACT same thing happened to me & I always schedule them for early in the week. I had the ultrasound at 4pm on a Friday & had to wait the weekend to hear the results. Thank goodness the ultrasound tech (who is not supposed to say anything) said something along the lines of, “I wouldn’t really worry about it over the weekend.” Thank you for sharing!
I’m 36. My mom was diagnosed at 45, and then died at 48, from metastatic breast cancer. That means I started mammos at 35 – which turned into 36 be I was still breastfeeding (I had kids late). First one = abnormal. Second one = abnormal. Stereotactic biopsy = not totally normal but not slam dunk for cancer either. Met w (super smart) breast surgeon. Did BRCA testing (negative). Next step – excision all biopsy, yet to be scheduled. I’d rather the mutation have been positive so I could just have a double mastectomy + oophorectomy and be done w it. Will see how the excisional biopsy goes. My husband has been super supportive but also very concerned throughout. It’s scary. I don’t know how my mom left us two kids (my sister and I). I can’t imagine leaving my two little kids now!
Sending you prayers, Caroline, that you do not have cancer. My twin sister passed away recently from it and leaving her kids was the hardest thing, no doubt. We (and they) were blessed that she was able to say goodbye to them and to tell them how proud she was of them.
Thank you sharing. I’m one of those who didn’t get suck great news. Had breast cancer at 33, then again at 36. Early detection is paramount!!! And I hug my douchenuggets even when they are being douchenuggets 😉 because it REALLY sucks when you can’t. F**K cancer!
I didn’t get good news either. You need to go get tested for BRCA1/2. With your history it is possible you carry the BRCA1 or 2 breast cancer gene.With that cancer in your family (your insurance company WILL pay for your genetic testing) because this gene is a killer and you NEED TO GO ASAP. My younger sister was BRCA1+ and she went for a mammo and was dx’d with breast cancer. While she was under anesthesia for the mastectomy they also discovered stage 4 ovarian cancer. She fought like a tiger and finally they tested her and she popped it and told me to get tested. Then she died November 18 2015 and I popped the test as well so my insurance company fell all over themselves to pay for a preventative hysterectomy that instead revealed stage 2-C Ovarian and Uterine cancer. High Grade Serous Carcinoma–it’s the most aggressive and virulent gynecological cancer there is–it’s what we BRCA1 girls get. While it is 1,24% of ALL cancer cases, 34% of the victims are BRCA1 or BRCA2 positive.
GO GET TESTED!!! TELL YOUR DOCTOR YOU THINK YOU MAY CARRY THE BRCA (BRACKA) GENE. YOU LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT!!!!!!
I got “we are pretty sure it’s a fibroid, but we are going to biopsy”
A week later, naked from the waist up, getting an ultrasound, “I can’t find it. It’s not there anymore” (accusing look at me)
Me: I don’t know what happened. These are the breasts I brought with me last week.
Been there, it can be scary but I’m glad you are ok. I had to get a biopsy done and they inserted some itty bitty tiny little dots to be able to track it in the future. Cancer sucks, everyone needs to keep on top of those girls and check them all the time. Again, HAPPY IT WAS A FALSE ALARM!!!!
As a cancer survivor myself (Hodgkin’s lymphoma) I can totally relate to the emotions and feelings you were going through in this experience. So glad to hear they were just cysts and nothing more! You never think it’s gonna be you that gets the cancer diagnosis and it truly is one of the most terrifying things the go through. And if it had been cancer, I know you would handle the journey with humor and grace and inspire so many people to share their story. I’m sure you’ve inspired many people to share very personal things with this post alone.
It made me cry!
Life is so precious and it can’t fully be appreciated until something scary like this happens. It’s humbling and makes you so thankful for what you have and glad you’re here to live another day. Carry on and hug those kids a little tighter tonight. God bless.
My maternal aunt survived breast cancer and my mom has fibrosistic breasts. Mammo and ultrasound each year for those two. I just turned 33 and can’t make myself go in for the fear of the needles that go along with the inevitable biopsies (of larger cysts). You may not have felt it but you were the very image of bravery for your family, whether they knew it or not. I only hope I can summon up that sort of back bone when my time comes. Thank you so much for sharing.
You need to go. With your family history it is VERY likely you carry the BRCA1 or 2 breast cancer gene.With that cancer in your family ( your insurance company WILL pay for your genetic testing) because this gene is a killer and you NEED TO GO ASAP. My younger sister was BRCA1+ and she went for a mammo and was dx’d with breast cancer. While she was under anesthesia for the mastectomy they also discovered stage 4 ovarian cancer. She fought like a tiger and finally they tested her and she popped it and told me to get tested. Then she died November 18 2015 and I popped the test as well so my insurance company fell all over themselves to pay for a preventative hysterectomy that instead revealed stage 2-C Ovarian and Uterine cancer. High Grade Serous Carcinoma–it’s the most aggressive and virulent gynecological cancer there is–it’s what we BRCA1 girls get. While it is 1,24% of ALL cancer cases, 34% of the victims are BRCA1 or BRCA2 positive.
GO GET TESTED!!! TELL YOUR DOCTOR YOU THINK YOU MAY CARRY THE BRCA (BRACKA) GENE. YOU LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT!!!!!!
I’m writing a book about this since no one knows what BRCA1 is or the dangers. GET TESTED!!!
Thank you for sharing this. I just got that call this morning and I was feeling the same way. Your story made me smile and laugh. That’s the first time since “the call”. I’m definitely more relaxed now and so glad everything was okay with you.
Thank goodness that they are cysts and nothing else. Thanks for the update BS. Love you (((hugs)))
I really hope to just give info and not p**s anybody off. But this mammogram biz is crap. Mammos missed a tumor the size of Texas on me. I haven’t met another girl with cancer that found it with a mammo. All self exams and ultrasounds.
WOW. I am glad that I found this post and I got the call today that I had to come back in for a new mammogram and another type of test. My mind went totally dark and it is 5 am in the morning and I can’t sleep. The appointment is today and I am going crazy. My mom had breast cancer at 55, I am 60. I am also unemployed (long-term). Thankful that I have medical assistance… but I am listening to the news in the background and all those freaking Republications are vowing to repeal Obamacare and someone in my position can’t afford for that to happen! I talked to both of my sisters and one of them had the cyst thing… so I am hoping that my fate is the same. Some days life really sucks.
To the young woman who wrote this: My grandmother also died of breast cancer in her 40s when was 14 months old. I never knew her really. However, she gave me the gift that keeps on giving–the BRCA1+ germline mutation that gives one a 79% chance of breast or ovarian cancer or both. With that much cancer in your family (and I’m betting it was your PATERNAL grandma that died of it–just like mine) your insurance company WILL pay for your genetic testing and you NEED TO GO ASAP. My younger sister was BRCA1+ and she went for a mammo and was dx’d with breast cancer. While she was under anesthesia for the mastectomy they also discovered stage 4 ovarian cancer. She fought like a tiger and finally they tested her and she popped it and told me to get tested. Then she died November 18 2015 and I popped the test as well so my insurance company fell all over themselves to pay for a preventative hysterectomy that instead revealed stage 2-C Ovarian and Uterine cancer. High Grade Serous Carcinoma–it’s the most aggressive and virulent gynecological cancer there is–it’s what we BRCA1 girls get. While it is 1,24% of ALL cancer cases, 34% of the victims are BRCA1 or BRCA2 positive.
GO GET TESTED!!! TELL YOUR DOCTOR YOU THINK YOU MAY CARRY THE BRCA (BRACKA) GENE. YOU LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT!!!!!!
I’m writing a book about this since no one knows what BRCA1 is or the dangers. GET TESTED!!!
To the young woman who wrote this article: My grandmother also died of breast cancer in her 40s when was 14 months old. I never knew her really. However, she gave me the gift that keeps on giving–the BRCA1+ germline mutation that gives one a 79% chance of breast or ovarian cancer or both. With that much cancer in your family (and I’m betting it was your PATERNAL grandma that died of it–just like mine) your insurance company WILL pay for your genetic testing and you NEED TO GO ASAP. My younger sister was BRCA1+ and she went for a mammo and was dx’d with breast cancer. While she was under anesthesia for the mastectomy they also discovered stage 4 ovarian cancer. She fought like a tiger and finally they tested her and she popped it and told me to get tested. Then she died November 18 2015 and I popped the test as well so my insurance company fell all over themselves to pay for a preventative hysterectomy that instead revealed stage 2-C Ovarian and Uterine cancer. High Grade Serous Carcinoma–it’s the most aggressive and virulent gynecological cancer there is–it’s what we BRCA1 girls get. While it is 1,24% of ALL cancer cases, 34% of the victims are BRCA1 or BRCA2 positive.
GO GET TESTED!!! TELL YOUR DOCTOR YOU THINK YOU MAY CARRY THE BRCA (BRACKA) GENE. YOU LIFE MAY DEPEND ON IT!!!!!!
I’m writing a book about this since no one knows what BRCA1 is or the dangers. GET TESTED!!!
I know this is from years ago but I am going through it now and I even bookmarked this page on my phone. I’ve been holding onto it like a talisman to make me feel better. Got the letter in the mail Friday afternoon and have follow up mammo tomorrow. Thank you for writing this post, it’s been a lifesaver for me!
Thinking of you and sending positive thoughts!
I too have a similar story, even a biopsy and a teeny tiny tattoo to mark the spot so we aren’t going through this every year. I can’t even imagine a different diagnosis. Cancer sucks donkey b***s