“I’m borrrred. There’s nothing to do. I already colored. I don’t wanna read. Why can’t I watch TV? How about I just hang out in whatever room you’re in and start whistling a super annoying song while stabbing you in the butt with a light saber?” Seriously? Seriously?!! I swear we own 9000 toys and…
It happened last fall. We were eating family dinner in our new kitchen when Zoey started leaning back in her chair. I swear I’ve told her 9000 times not to do it, but this time guess what happened? SNAPPPP!!!! The leg to the chair cracked right in half and the entire chair crashed to the…
Do you ever mess up with your kid’s schedule? Because I pulled a doozie (doozy??) this weekend. Like you accidentally forget about an activity and you schedule a play date at the same time or you totally forget to bring your kid to a birthday party and don’t realize until afterward? You’re sitting there chilling…
You know when you’re sitting in the roller coaster and it pulls away from the station and you get this feel like awww crap, here we go? Yup, that feeling. I mean I’ve heard older parents say it a million times, “Bigger kids bigger problems,” but you don’t really know WTF they’re talking about until…
Okay, so I have a question. And pleeeeease don’t jump down my throat for asking this because this is not about stirring up some unnecessary drama. This is a genuine question to figure out WTF to do. So here’s the dealio. As many of you know, we’re headed to Disney this summer (because you know,…
Dear mom who’s going back to work after maternity leave, Congratulations, you’re going back!! You’re an independent woman who’s not letting any pipsqueak baby stop you from being a breadwinner. You must feel amazing! Wait, what? Are you crying? Awwww, don’t cry. You’re gonna love being back at your job. I mean just think…
1. I want my hubby to do all the packing. And if he forgets some stuff, oh well. Guess I’m going on a big-ass shopping spree. 2. I want the airlines to bump us all up to first class. And by “us” I mean, all the moms on the flight. 3. I want our…
Okay, let’s play a game. It’s called “whose night sucked the most?” Like maybe your kid woke you up four times in the middle of the night, or maybe your rugrat had the stomach bug and splatter-painted your shins with vomit, or maybe your hubby came home drunk and decided to wake you out of…
Okay, so I should probably look this stuff up online and see if the professionals have any suggestions, but that would take time and honestly, this all kind of happened spur of the moment and I had to talk to Zoey about it right away. So here’s what happened. ZOEY: Mommmmmm!!! MOMMMMMMMMM!!!!!
Well, this sucks. A lot. Poor Zoey is pretty upset about what happened and I don’t blame her one single bit. I mean usually I’m the first one to tell my kids to buck up and shake it off and make lemonade and shit, but this time it’s harder. Lemme start at the beginning. So…