My message of hope to the next Supreme Court Justice

To the person who will become the next Supreme Court Justice,

I don’t know who you are yet, but I wanted to reach out to you with hope. This country is a crazy place right now full of anger and emotions, so it’s hard to keep speaking calmly when everyone around you is yelling. But I’ll try.

You are going to make some very important decisions, decisions that will last for decades. Which means your choices will affect not just me, not just my children, but my grandchildren, even my great grandchildren. So it’s my duty to stand up for them, years before they even exist.

I’m just one mother in the middle of the country imploring you. Please. Listen to the other side before you make up your mind. Don’t just hear it. LISTEN.

There was a time that I was a raging maniac if I spoke to someone who was pro-life, but I’ve changed. I opened my mind, and now I actually get where they’re coming from. I may not agree with them, but I can see their logic. Because I listened.

But there’s one subject that I am SURE will come up when you’re on the court and I just don’t get it. I’ve tried to put myself in the other side’s shoes, really tried, but it baffles me. I’ve racked my brain for any reasonable, logical, understandable reason they feel the way they do, but I still can’t come up with one.

Why on earth would you stop two people who are in love from marrying each other? Who does it hurt?

If Joe and Carlos get married, how does that affect Jim and Rachel, or Anne and William, or Mike and Karen? It doesn’t cheapen their heterosexual marriage. Marriage is as strong as the two people who make their vows. Straight, gay, black, white, Jewish, Catholic.

I hate olives. But I don’t think other people shouldn’t be allowed to eat them. My friend owns a painting that I think is hideous, but it’s not my job to tell her to take it down. Yes I have to look at it when I go to her house, but if it bothers me, I just look away. I have friends who I think shouldn’t be married, but it’s not my decision to make. 

We like what we like, we love who we love, and as long as it’s not hurting anyone else, who are we to stop it? And in a world that’s constantly fighting and attacking each other, isn’t more love a good thing?

So congratulations on your new job. I’m sure you must be very smart, very experienced, and you’ve probably worked very hard to get there. I just ask that when you are on the most sacred court in our country that you try not to be a conservative or a liberal, a Republican or a democrat, a straight person or a gay person, a zealot or an atheist, or a million other things. Just try to be human. Listen to the people who make up this country. Not just the ones who got you into that position. All of them.


A mom/A future grandmother/A future great grandmother

There are 12 comments for this article
  1. PirateJenny at 1:09 pm

    Great advice for ALL of our leaders, particularly the elected ones. It’s a shame many of them fail in this regard.

  2. Meg at 1:44 pm

    A great message for all who serve our country and/or hold positions of power! But also, fundamentally, a great message for EVERYONE. You rock.

  3. Jen Graham at 8:42 pm

    Thank you and amen. I’ve never understood why it’s ok for me to marry my best friend but not for my uncle too. Love is love. As long as no one gets hurt there is nothing wrong in it. I’m pro choice I can see the argument for the other side as well as harbor no ill will towards anyone for believing different. I respect others opinions I just don’t understand why marriage has to be segregated.

  4. Kimberley at 5:02 pm

    I hope that your message reaches some ears and some listening *does* happen. Whether it’s the next Supreme Court Justice, some readers, or both. Thank you for holding space for those who are different, both in your heart and in your column/work. It means a lot. <3

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