Okay, so Zoey just got her first (and hopefully last) American Girl Doll as a gift, and let me say this. HOLYYYYY SHIT am I in the WRONG business. I mean you know how they say a house is $XX per square foot? I think they should do the same for these dolls. This is Isabelle. She’s…
I’m just gonna come right out and say it. I am a Disney person. No matter how messed up your life is, for at least the first few minutes when you’re walking down Main Street in Magic Kingdom you can’t help but be optimistic. I mean I’m not gonna lie about how it’s going to…
1. WTF is that? 2. At least it’s contained.
ME: Hey Aimee,what’s that? AIMEE: My veggetti. ME: Your what? AIMEE: My veggetti! ME: I’m not sure I want to see your veggetti. AIMEE: It’s okay, I show my veggetti to everyone. It’s so easy. See, I just stick a zucchini in my veggetti and it’s go time.
Okay, I have a confession to make and I’ve been feeling shitty about it all week. So last weekend was Zoey’s birthday party and she picked out a super cute pink sparkly leotard to wear for it. And then she picked out a super cute black one with neon designs for Holden to wear. Yup,…
ME: Hello? RECEPTIONIST: Hi this is Nancy at Willow Hospital, I’m calling about your recent mammogram. Insert stomach in throat. ME: Yes? RECEPTIONIST: We need you to come back in for a repeat mammogram. Let’s see, we don’t have any openings today. Let me look at Monday. Trying not to freak out. ME: Can you tell…
Holy crap, have you seen this picture circulating around the internet?!!
Dear Baby Sideburns, My Mother-in-Law refers to herself as Nana when she emails me, leaves me voicemails, texts me, etc. She is not MY Nana! It’s driving me crazy. What should I do? You’re the best. Emily Dear Emily, Oh, I am SOOOOOO sorry you are going through this. I mean this is like my…
Dear Baby Sideburns, I feel bad saying this but my daughter is very hairy and has a unibrow already. She’s only two, but I’m wondering when you think it’s okay for me to “take care” of it. I know you can relate because you always say how hairy you are. Sincerely, Alyssa Dear Alyssa, Okay,…
Dear Baby Sideburns, I need some tips!!! For the first time post baby, I’ve been asked when my baby is due. For the record, I’m 5’5 160lb and slightly overweight, nothing out of the norm. And I’ve lost 25lb in the past year so to say I’m pissed is an understatement. I’d love to hear some…